Christmas 2009.

Click here for the audio blog.

Music:
"Carol of the Bells" Trans-Siberian Orchestra featuring Metallica
"It's Beginning to Look A lot Like Christmas" Bing Crosby
"Christmas Time is Here" Vince Guaraldi Trio
"The Christmas Song" Nat King Cole
"Deck the Halls" Alena Hicken & Rebecca Mordo
"Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" Brenda Lee

It is 3 days before Christmas. Last weekend, we received our first bit of road-sticking, “danger” snow, though the only remnants of it now are nestled atop my car’s windshield. I decided that this week, I’d keep (most of) my cynical sarcasm at bay, and talk about my favorite Christmas traditions, be they big or small.

1. The shopping.
Somehow the smell of fresh evergreens mixed with Abercrombie and Fitch’s natural tool aroma distracts me from the screaming children, hormonal Hot Topic dwelling teenagers and mothers at the brink of sanity being harassed at every kiosk they pass.

2. The music.
Ah, yes. From Bing Crosby’s “It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas,” to the entire Charlie Brown Christmas album by Vince Guaraldi Trio, to my all time favorite Nat King Cole’s “The Christmas Song.” Each tune hits me just right and makes me feel 5 years old again.

3. The decorations.
I feel I can say with much confidence that our apartment is the most cheery of the complex. From the bow on our front door, to the lights framing our back sliding doors, I imagine passers-by looking in are filled with warmth, joy and envy for the badass that is our holiday cheer. Our tree is bright with symmetrical decorations and the living room grandfather clock brings peace to all who gaze upon its ticking face. Outside of the clock, I had next to nothing to do with any of this.

4. The family and friends.
This year, I get to celebrate Christmas day with two families: my blood relatives who are my best friends and biggest supporters, and my Bloomington family, who are there for me, entertain me and keep me out of trouble from day to day.

Though our Christmas is not ostentatious,
We love and remain humble & gracious,
With the love of family and dear friends,
Outlasting the cold, our Christmas spirit sees no end.

Happy Holidays to all, may 2010 bring you and yours peace, joy and well-deserved revenge upon your enemies.

California Dreamin' Remix

This is one of my all-time favorite songs, so, of course, I had to mess with it. It is short and sweet.

Original version of "California Dreamin'" by The Mamas & the Papas from their 1966 debut, If You Can Believe Your Eyes and Ears.

Beat from various contributors to www.looperman.com.

Christmas Time is Here Remix.

I finished this a couple weeks ago and thought I'd post it somewhere.

This uses both the instrumental and vocal performances of "Christmas Time is Here" by Vince Guaraldi Trio and from A Charlie Brown Christmas.

Drum beat from various contributors to www.looperman.com.

Second Floor Bowling Alley.

Click here for audio blog.

Music: Vince Guaraldi Trio "Linus and Lucy" A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965)

My neighbors to the sky (i.e., my upstairs neighbors) have apparently decided that 5 o’clock on a Saturday is the time to jazzercise. That or they somehow fit a bowling alley in their living room. Either way, I’m beginning to wish I was more domestic so I’d own a broom that I could use to hit the ceiling. I contemplated marching upstairs and asking them to quiet down, but I’m not doing anything that necessitates silence. They’d open the door to some geeky-looking twenty-something with her hands on her hips, foaming at the mouth, saying, “Could you please quiet down?? I’m trying to harvest crops on Farmville and your stomping around is ruining my concentration!” I imagine they’d just slowly close the door on the crazy American brat.

Earlier today, a thirty minute trip across town to pick up my roommate and take him to work turned into a ninety minute affair. Traffic was horrendous, and I was not prepared for the dumbassery that comes with out-of-town sports fans trying to leave a game. For some reason, I feel incredibly put out by these people in my city, congesting my streets, being cut off by my assholes. I sat in the same stretch of twenty feet for thirty-five minutes, watching people trying to get by me on the shoulder. “No!” I wanted to scream, “This is MY road! I was here long before you! I have some place very important to be and I am noting this indiscretion to make sure you are not invited back!”

Unfortunately, assholery can be contagious. Upon arriving at my destination, I realized I had left the TV dinner my roommate requested on the couch, ya know, where you keep TV dinners. I told him I’d drive home, get the dinner and bring it back. Whilst driving to and from, I was cutting people off, running yellow lights, flipping off young children and their grandparents. But, somehow, I felt completely justified. “I pay taxes here. I deal with the traffic on a daily basis. You’re here for the weekend to “get away,” then you get to go home!” I don’t know why I think other towns aren’t as frustrating as mine. I actually love the city I live in, so I’m not quite certain what got into me. Just, next time, out-of-town sports fans/parents of college students, when we’re caught in a traffic jam together, try not to look so damned happy. It’d make things a lot easier for us townies.